my grandma died 3 months ago and I'm not okay I can't keep it together and I just don't feel happy ever anymore
Sorry for the loss of your grandma. I know exactly how you are feeling. My sister passed away 2 months ago and it is very hard to imagine ever feeling happy again. I try to keep myself busy which helps for a while but the feelings never leave. The grieving process takes time and I am told by some that it does get better and that is what I am hoping for. You never forget your loss but at some point you can start to move on. I find that this site helps me a lot connecting to others who are going through the same thing.
