Where is the help

Discussion in 'Coping After a Sudden Loss' started by Kriss, Dec 3, 2019.

  1. Kriss

    Kriss Well-Known Member

    Why is it that whenever I am upset and need to talk about my husband and cry nobody is around. Where are all the people that said they would be there for me? They are tired of hearing it and they all left. I hate being like this. I want my husband back I miss him so much.
  2. MarieKG

    MarieKG New Member

    I find this happens quite often. At first they'll be there but then they expect you to just get over it. I wonder if people who have dealt with grief do this, too.
  3. Deanna1967

    Deanna1967 New Member

    I'm missing my husband is 13 years old. February 23, 2019. Sorry. I'm my of a 4-year-old stroke and I'm moving in the family, (state MS and MN) he died for 7 months. Crazy, Huh? I'm crazy. I Don't know. I'm scared. My need for my help.
  4. Deanna1967

    Deanna1967 New Member

    And Christmas again, where are you? I'm confused.
  5. Cora1961

    Cora1961 Well-Known Member

    Same here!! Nobody around
  6. Vickie

    Vickie Active Member

    My heart goes out to you. I have not lost a spouse but I know the depth of pain and grief that comes from losing someone you loved and lost.
    cg123 and Cora1961 like this.
  7. cg123

    cg123 Well-Known Member

    So true.
  8. Ray G.

    Ray G. Well-Known Member

    Yup, I gave up on things. Maybe it is that as we get older, family
    expects us to grow up, get freakin with it. Keep ur grief to yourself.
    Well I am doing that. I love
    all my family but if one of them
    or spouse dies, I may not want to
    be around to talk about it.
    They talk religion all the time
    tho. So I feel there is some
    I Will be an want to be
    friendly an that is it. I had 1
    very rough and sad time and
    SO needed to talk. It just was
    not going to happen. So in ways,
    what they sow, they will reap.
  9. David Hughes

    David Hughes Well-Known Member

    So sorry for your loss. I see you posted this quite awhile ago and not a lot of response. I am not sure why, but one thing to remember, even though we are all suffering under a grief cloud, the time of year also comes into play. People scatter during the holidays, some close their mind to dealing with loss of theirs and others during what clearly is suppose to be the most special time of the year.

    I think about Thanksgiving and Christmas, a time family would gather, and hazard trips no matter the weather. I know it is extremely hard to open up about loss. It is also hard to work through that pain, and be receptive to others at times. We each have so much to give to one another, our insight, our caring words, our time on these forums.

    I miss my wife each and every day. There isn't a day that goes by that I haven't shed a tear for her. Healing inside ourselves takes time.

    Sorrow is an awful word, much less a hard feeling to be able to open up about. When we cry, and shed tears we are telling ourselves we need help, so if we can we reach out to others.

    No one here is tired of hearing how bad you are feeling, and how much you miss your loved one. There is nothing wrong in just posting and opening up about you, your loved one, how you feel, some memories you cherish. We all love to hear those, and also wish you to take the time to heal. As you open up and tell us, we understand you are in pain, we all wish we could help you heal quicker.

    Please remember you are no less important than the next person. Take your time to open up, allow yourself to slowly come to terms with life, and please remember, that whatever you say is ok, those words are coming from your heart, so there are no wrong words.

    Take care of yourself and never give up on yourself.


    Kriss this song is especially for you:

  10. Vickie

    Vickie Active Member

    What a thoughtful and caring reply.