Wednesday ART THERAPY

Janiceanne,

What you're experiencing, unfortunately is one thing that all of us share. Triggers, especially in the beginning of this way beyond miserable journey, are everywhere. For a long time, I couldn't go anywhere without a pocket full of tissues. When I went grocery shopping, I wore sunglasses inside. Just walking down an aisle and seeing one of Bob's favorite foods, had me in tears... The way beyond cheesy piped in music, had me in tears... For many months after Bob died, I couldn't eat any of his favorite foods... I couldn't eat at the kitchen table. Seeing his empty chair, had me in tears... I could go on and on and on, outlasting that "Energizer Bunny," but will stop here.

Do whatever you have to do to make it through today. Cry as long and as much as you need to. Remember that even though it might not feel this way right now, you've taken another step forward on this over the top miserable journey, a journey that not one of us would have chosen to take. The more you allow yourself to grieve..., to mourn..., the better you will feel in the long run.

Sending you lots of hugs and love, wishing you peace, all of us peace. DEB

 

Robin,

I'm sorry to hear you haven't been feeling well. Migraines are the absolute worst!!! I hope they're finally history!!! I've been struggling lots lately too. I know it's because of the holi daze, George's perfect description of this no longer over the top magical time of year.

I hope you and your daughter enjoyed the movie. It's good that you got out of your house, escaped reality for awhile.

As always, sending you, Teddy and Slinky, lots of hugs and love, wishing you peace, all of us peace. DEB

 

Georgester,

This time of year SUCKS!!!, but, and this is another one of those really BIG!!! BUTS!!!, we CAN!!! and WILL!!! get through the darkest days of our lives together, and with help from our GIC "family."

As always, sending you lots of hugs and love, wishing you peace, all of us peace. Debster in TUTTAMVILLE

 

Georgster,

Your day reminds me of a book I used to read to my kids. Foggy widow brain strikes again!!! I can't remember the name of it, but the main character had an absolutely horrible day when everything that could possibly go wrong, went wrong. He not only survived his very bad day, but went on to have a better one. The holi daze are almost over!!! We're almost there... Before we know it, New Year's Eve, New Year's Day, will be history!!! Hang in there...

Wishing you a much better 2023 in every way... filled with more smiles than tears...

As always, sending you lots of hugs and love, wishing you peace, all of us peace. DEB in TUTTAMVILLE

 

Hey I know how you feeling. Me and another friend just talk about how weird it seems ending and beginning a year without our loves. Reflecting on memories is sweet. You will make it through the day. We all will. It seems rough but we have each other and we're getting stronger each day so we will get through it. Sending everyone a virtual hug.

 

Just gotta get thru it all! Soundz so simple but hard when one is tired, bored, lonely and uninterested in stuff... We shall persevere!

 

Debster, I'm celebrating New Year's Eve,
with live music and friends at my local
cafe. This place didn't exist when Linda
was alive. More importantly, she
never knew any of my friends, or the
apartment I'm grateful to have right
now. New Year's Day doesn't bother me,
bc stores are open. unlike Christmas
Day. The Godfather of Lobsterville

 

This message was important for me last year, I couldn't identify the feeling and so soon after his death it is mind bending to try figuring out what to do with time still moving forward when I just wanted it to stop and let me breathe a minute at least. All out of tissues, moved on to a washcloth for the night.
Blessed night GWs.
~B

 

?? A favorite!

 

I’m so sorry Janiceanne. Sending hugs and love ❤️.

 

Deb,
Thank you, had another migraine today. This is rare for me. So many days in a row. I’m sorry you’re struggling too. Such a hard time of year. We’ll get through though. We have to. Passing time today as is our tradition watching The Twilight Zone marathon.
Hope you’re doing well. Robin

 

Now it will be!

 

Hello my GW friends, it's morning here, I know some of you have just seen in the New Year and others haven't yet.
I didn't sleep much, I knew I wouldn't.
My first thought this morning was to write to you and send you all a virtual comfort hug, I feel a real bond now with all of you, thank you. You're helping me make it, you really and truly are.

Gary, I've been listening to Kristen Neff's audios and watched one of her videos. She has given me a lot of 'food for thought'. Self-compassion hadn't occurred to me, I've been doing the exact opposite, blaming and being angry with myself, regrets, and so on. She has such a soothing, calm voice too. I've taken notes of what she says, so I will refer to them everytime I have one of my 'grief attacks'. Thanks for telling me about her.

Rose

 

Good Sunday morning and Happy New
Year to you, Rose, and to all the brave
Grief Warriors. I'm grateful , every day,
for the friends I've made on Grief in
Common. I tell people who are suffering
from the death of a loved one, to try this
site. I also tell them about Center for
Loss, founded by Dr. Alan Wolfelt.
Soothing quotations on grieving come
to one's email address, via email, same
time every day. Let us hope that 2023 will
be less painful in our grief journey, than
in previous years. Lou

 

Thank you, dear Lou, and also from me, best wishes for the coming year to you and all our GW friends.
Rose.

 

For those who aren't receiving these, I thought I would share the Center For Loss Daily Reflection for today ~B

 

Bernadine,

I'm over the top impressed that you've read the book I was "talking" about... After you added a picture of the cover in your post, I had to watch a short online video of someone reading it. I must have added that optimistic twist at the end when I read this story to my children. No where in the book, did it say that he went on to have a better day, lol!!! I guess I read the book so much, adding in this optimistic twist, that I didn't remember the real ending, lol... Sometimes I miss those days, when my children were so young and innocent..., but, and this is another one of those really BIG!!! BUTS!!!, I quickly remember when they were teens, and am SO!!! glad those days are over, lol...

As always, sending you and Maggie, lots of hugs and love, wishing you peace, all of us peace. DEB

 

Debster , Thank you & TGW for
brightening what started as a very
sad morning, my wedding anniversary,
this day , in 1996. Lou

 

Robin,

I hope you're feeling much better today, both physically and emotionally. I can't seem to knock Mr. Grief unconscious... As you said, it's such a difficult time of year... I spent the evening watching a sitcom on Netflix. It had lots of laugh out loud moments, and I was surprised that in spite of how sad I've been, I was able to laugh. This IS!!! progress... I'm thinking "baby steps."

Backing up a bit, last night before I tuned into Netflix, I was talking to Bob as I always do. I asked him to please let me know he is here with me. I was crying, and rapidly plowing through a box of tissues. By Sunday mornings, my kitchen trash can needs emptying. As usual, I took the full bag into the garage and put it into the big garbage can. When I opened the door leading from my laundry room into my garage, the lights were on. I knew they were off when I went to bed last night. I started crying, but they were happy tears. I told Bob how much I love him... A calm feeling washed over me...

Bittersweet SUCKS!!!, but as you said, we'll get through this. We don't have a choice. Although it isn't the same, it is such a good feeling to know that Bob is watching over me, just as Ron is watching over you.

As always, sending you, Teddy and Slinky, lots of hugs and love, wishing you peace, all of us peace. DEB

 

Bernadine,

Great minds think alike, lol... If I knew how to post images online, I would have posted this one.

As always, sending you and Maggie, lots of hugs and love, wishing you peace, all of us peace. DEB