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The rules of engagement

Discussion in 'Dating Again After the Loss of a Spouse/Partner' started by plalonde, May 1, 2019.

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  1. plalonde

    plalonde New Member

    It has been 25 years since I last dated. Now at 53 I have not a clue where to start. I have looked in to the online services and find that they are bad. Even at their best they are bad. I do believe most only want your money and not your happiness in finding your next chapter.

    Hope does someone meet people at 53? I DO NOT do the bar and club seen and find my church to not offer any support either.
     
    plalonde, May 1, 2019
    #1
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  2. griefic

    griefic Administrator Staff Member

    Plalonde, I'm so sorry for your loss and the challenges that have come as a result of it. Dating can be hard at any point in life but I think a griever feels especially vulnerable. Online dating sites can be good and bad, and most people don't want to spend too much in a bar and worry about the people they meet there. Perhaps a class, or a club, a volunteer opportunity - or a place where you can find people with similar interests? I hear good things about meet ups and find they have a LOT of options...something for everyone really. It's worth exploring, especially if you feel ready to add a new relationship to your life. I know it's hard, but it's possible, and I wish you all the best in the future~
     
    griefic, May 19, 2019
    #2
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  3. Aude

    Aude Member

    Hi. I would suggest telling your friends, coworkers, and others within your social circles that you would like to begin dating. Someone may know a nice person to introduce you to, and the first meeting could even involve the person/people you both know. Making it a double date or small group dinner, for instance, will reduce the pressure on everyone and make it more relaxed.
     
    Aude, Jun 12, 2019
    #3
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  4. Sapphiresteel77

    Sapphiresteel77 Active Member

    You could try new things. When I lost my husband I had no clue who I was without him. I didn't like the same things bc I am not the same person I was. I try new things when I get the chance. We were married 20yrs. My late husband changed what I like. Sometimes I changed bc it was what he liked. I did the dating sights but I also had never met a man of God. I was just getting back to my faith. I found fun and holy which helped learn what I should do as I prepared to one day find someone again. It's mostly from a woman's perspective I am sure that there's something similar for men. I learned how important it was to have a man of God. To be equally yoked. Bc if you aren't you will be doing all the work in the relationship and it's not good. I wish you all the best in your journey. Pray for your future love. May you be blessed.
     
    Sapphiresteel77, Jul 22, 2024
    #4