My first day home alone…

Discussion in 'Coping After a Sudden Loss' started by hsmaestro, Aug 2, 2021.

  1. hsmaestro

    hsmaestro New Member

    My husband died 2 weeks ago today at the age of 48. After planning his funeral where we live and attending a memorial where he grew up, today is my first day home alone. He was diagnosed with cirrhosis of the liver in April and Kidney failure in May. His doctor constantly told me he was walking a fine line, but was just released to rehab on 7/14 before being readmitted to a different hospital on the 16th and passing on the 19th. I just find myself with SO MANY QUESTIONS…Why’s and What If’s… I also find myself feeling some guilt wondering what I could do differently.
    We met 22 years ago as teachers at the school district we continued to work at… So our relationship was 24/7/365… My heart is empty and broken. My friends and family are great listeners and have been there every step through this but like my best friend told me today, I am here for you…anything that you need, but I can’t even begin to understand what you are going through or how you are feeling… My research from that comment brought me here…
    Whittysmom and Chris M 2000 like this.
  2. Patti 67

    Patti 67 Active Member

    No one can begin to understand, unless they have
    lost their soulmate I am so sorry for you’re loss.
  3. Oyin

    Oyin New Member

    So sorry for your loss. May you find peace .
  4. Shalamar1958

    Shalamar1958 New Member

    So sorry for your loss. I lost my soulmate on June 8, 2020. He came home from work, 1 hour later he was gone. He was 58. We were together for 30 years. I went from being in a loving relationship, to being alone...in a few days.. It has been 2.5 yrs. I miss him always. I haven't figured out how to be single/alone. I hate it without him. If you would like to talk, let me know.. Again sorry for your loss.
  5. Chris M 2000

    Chris M 2000 Well-Known Member

    So very sorry for your loss and your pain. Hang in there. Take good care of yourself and do the little things you can do. No others can't really understand unless they have suffered a great loss as you have, but I am so glad they are trying to support you in the only way they know how. Hang onto God. He will pull you through just as he did for me.
    Whittysmom likes this.
  6. CathyLynn

    CathyLynn Member

    Hello, My name is Cathy. I am a teacher also. My husband died in June and i still miss him so much. I have been seeing a i therapist since July and find it has helped me deal with my survivor guilt greatly. i am still grieving but am able to understand those things that were beyond my control.
  7. kelso

    kelso Well-Known Member

    lost my wife jan 2023 afyer 44 years together . i am a MESS