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Milestones

Discussion in 'Suicide Loss' started by CaseP, Mar 19, 2023.

  1. CaseP

    CaseP New Member

    Hi, I lost my dad in the middle of January this year, but we weren’t in speaking terms for months before that. I had tried communicating with him for months but it had been hard to get through to him. My birthday is coming up in May and all I can think about it that the last decent conversation I had with my dad was on my birthday last year. Just thinking of my birthday reminds me of every other holiday I have to go through and he won’t be here for. He died before I got the chance to even fall in love and get married. I never thought I would have to think about these things so soon, I mean I’m only 22 I didn’t think Id loose my dad this early in life. Does this ever get easier? Will I ever stop thinking of milestones im going to have throughout my life that he won’t get to experience with me? Does it stop hurting?
     
  2. Chris M 2000

    Chris M 2000 Well-Known Member

    I am sorry for the loss of your dad. As you are, we are all shocked by the loss of someone we love. Milestones such as birthdays, holidays, etc. are hard because they hold so many memories of the one we love.
    We have also suffered the loss of our 28 year old son to suicide; I understand what you are going through. You may experience many feelings such as anger, sadness, physical symptoms, frustration, etc. Feelings are not good or bad, right or wrong. They are just feelings. It is what you do with those feelings that matters. I hope you have someone you feel comfortable talking with.
    To answer your questions, yes, it does get easier and the pain is not as bad as it is now. Grief is a walk that we have to learn how to negotiate. Your life is different now and you are even a different person. Life can still be good especially if you have a relationship with Jesus. He loves and cares about the pain you are suffering and He can strengtthen you and give you peace in your troubled situation if you will reach out to Him.
    Do you have any support from your family or friends or anyone you can talk with?
    Be patient and kind to yourself. Learning to live with this unexpected reality will take some time getting used to and learning how to walk the path of grief; but you are not alone. We love you and understand how difficult this can be because we have all suffered a loss.
    Please keep in touch with us.
    Chris