I Miss My Mama

Discussion in 'Loss of a Parent' started by Wegotthis20, Jun 7, 2020.

  1. Wegotthis20

    Wegotthis20 New Member

    April 18th was the worse day of my life, I loss my Mom from lung cancer complications. She wasn't a smoker, health, saw her doctor regularly and by the time they found it, it was stage 4. It was basically all over her body. I just don't understand how this can happen and why why did God have to take my Mom. Somedays are okay and others like right now I'm a mess and all I want to do is cry.. I just honestly do that know how I'm going to function without her in my life. She was the best Grandmother & Mother ever. I would give anything to hear her voice again...
  2. Aveer

    Aveer New Member

    I'm soo sorry for your loss
    Wegotthis20 likes this.
  3. Danielle_Theresa

    Danielle_Theresa New Member

    I lost my mom suddenly in March. I relate to everything you are feeling. I have no idea how to move forward. Everything feels so pointless without my mom, and I cry all the time. My mom had a simple procedure & then passed from complications from it. She was scheduled to come home the next day. It’s so hard. I’d give anything to be able to hug her one more time. It’s so unfair, things like this aren’t supposed to happen.
    Gingersnap, Gammaw9 and JoNas like this.
  4. Wegotthis20

    Wegotthis20 New Member

    I've realized life isn't far & you've got to treasure what you have.
    JoNas and Sweetcole like this.
  5. Sweetcole

    Sweetcole Well-Known Member

    I agree you definitely have to treasure what you have. Losing a parent is hard. Its seems like your world is over right now. Time want get rid of you pain but it'll make it easier to deal with. I'm here for you if you need to talk
    Wegotthis20 likes this.
  6. JesFiveHealth

    JesFiveHealth Member

    We got this
    Sorry to hear of your loss
    I lost my father an when he was alive he would squeeze me really hard an not let go I with you a really hard squeeze hug an not let go of you
    We Support You
    We Care For You
    We Respect You
    We Love You
    I Love You
    Gingersnap likes this.
  7. TLC50

    TLC50 Member

    I feel your pain and understand how you feel. I feel disconnected to everyone around me. You're in my thoughts.

    I loss my Mom, January 21, 2020 to breathing complications related to stage 4 carcinoma cancer. She was diagnosed on December 1, 2020 and died 8 days after her 70th birthday. Since, her passing I can't deal with the grief, always feeling alone, and lost without her. She was also my best friend; I thank God that I moved in with my parents 3 years ago after getting divorced. I lived in NJ while my parents lived here in Florida; they invited me to come here and start a new life. I'm grateful that I had that time. However; never thought I would make decisions about my Mom's life. My Dad left decisions up to me because he couldn't deal with it and also has a problem with remembering things. Sometimes, I feel really guilty because I gave her permission to die; of course, because I didn't want her to suffer. I struggle with being alone, my lifetime friends live in NJ and I have no friends here. Weekends are always a struggle because I have to much time on my hands; my thoughts and feelings never stop. My therapist suggested I do a vision board but I can't imagine a life without her.
  8. Liley773

    Liley773 Well-Known Member

    I understand. At least you gave her permission to do what she had to do. Especially to not suffer more was very unselfish of you. I think she understood that and was happy she had your blessings to go. You did the right thing if my opinion counts for anything here. I'm lost without my mom too. She was fine the night before. Found her the next morning probably not long after.....I didn't get to say goodbye. Didn't get to say it was ok. But I think if she had a choice she spared me that pain. I just never got closure. She was my everything too as I'm an only child. No other relatives here or close. I keep wanting to go tell her something about my day or update her on this or that....She's not there...she is gone. I have to deal with that fact. Her room is empty....I can feel her presence tho....she's ok. Worried about me as usual...My therapist didn't work out at all. I fired her.
  9. TLC50

    TLC50 Member

    I'm sorry for your loss also Lilev773. I know; my Mom was everything to me too. I want to talk or tell her things and than remember she's not here. I can't hear her voice and recall her smell. There are memories through out the house but sometimes that makes it even harder. I expect her to be sitting in the living room. My Dad got rid of my Mom's things a week after she died; that was his way of dealing with things. Everything reminds me of her and I'm just having a real hard time dealing with my grief. I wanted to take her on a cruise for my 50th birthday; it was a dream she never got to do. I turned 50 last weekend it was the worst birthday of my life; I spent it only in a hotel room because I didn't want my Dad or daughter to see my pain. I'm really sorry to hear your therapist didn't work out. I'm lucky in that regard; I've been with my therapist for almost 2 years and I couldn't do this without her. I do tel-therapy if you ever want to try again. I could share the information.
  10. Liley773

    Liley773 Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry your birthday was in seclusion. Mine was 1 week to the day afternom passsed. Mother's Day was the weekend she passed. And Maggie died right after Mother's Day. It was horrible. I really felt like I'd lost my mind for good. I'm definitely damaged . I don't think I'll ever recover from this. Then covid hit and made this horrific nightmare worse. I may take you up on the therapist offer but right now I'm not in a good place for it. Thank you though. I hope at some point you can enjoy your family that you have still with you . I don't have that except for in my babies here. I cherish each one more everyday. I just wish we could all concentrate on life instead of death everyday. But that doesn't seem to be happening.
  11. TLC50

    TLC50 Member

    Yes, I agree with feeling damaged and nothing will ever be the same. I know a part of me died with my Mom. The hard part is living without her. I don’t know how to do that. I go thru the motions pretending everything is ok. You’re definitely right COVID did help us at all. In addition; to losing my Mom, I have left isolated and alone. I’m glad we can talk and support each other. Please keep the therapy in mind; my therapist is genuine and compassionate. I would recommend her to anyone. Sending prayers
  12. frdanger

    frdanger New Member

    I definitely understand. I lost my mom on February 10, 2020, after being diagnosed with colon cancer in October 2019. She was 84. I know she lived a long life, but I am struggling. I am trying to keep going. COVID did not help. Going to work and being with my students helped me, but being at home is not. I do not know how to move forward. I feel like I take two steps forward and five steps back.
  13. frdanger

    frdanger New Member

    I am sorry for your loss. I definitely understand. I really do. I wish things were different and I understand why things aren't. I wish I knew the right words to say.