Double loss

I lost my only son on November 3rd and then my Dad on December 13th 2025. I know it hasn't been long since the passing but I feel alone. I don't talk to anyone because I don't want to hear any bullshit. I keep myself locked in the room where my son slept and before I know it the day is gone. I don't go out because I don't want to anymore. Im lucky if I make dinner once a week and I have to be run out of clothes to do laundry. I feel like I can't do anything my bills aren't getting paid because I don't send them out. If I need any food I have it delivered then it takes me hours to put it away if I remember it was there. There are so many things I could say but I know I'm still here in the flesh but I'm not alive something I told my son I would be was ok and I'm not.......