I lost the live of my life Friday AT 2pm on October 26, 2018. My life stopped then as well. 1 week ago today. I am now alone in a house that is no longer a home. I am lost confused and not sure what to expect since I have so many emotions. I feel guilty for being alive. I feel angry that someone involved in the accident with him is alive and at home with his family when my sweetie cannot be.. My emotions are changing by the minute, I cannot function regardless of how hard I try. Sleeping appears to be a thing of the past. Nightmares are frequent if I do dose off. Images that I saw cannot be unseen. I wish there was a book to tell me how to feel and what to do each day. How do I live without him??? I wish I knew...my heart is crushed....
TNGAL I am so sorry for your loss. I know this may bring little comfort, but everything you are describing is very normal and very common in the early days of loss, especially when it is a sudden loss. With no time to prepare, most grievers find themselves exactly where you are- in a blur of emotions not knowing what to do next. I wish there was a book too, a guide or a manual that could tell grievers exactly what to do and when to do it. I guess we're all so different that there isn't just one path to take when it comes to grieving, but what I can tell you is that really isn't any wrong way to do it. As strange and as foreign as all this seems, and as far from yourself as you've ever felt, you're doing the best you can and that's all you can do right now. Our blog is filled with articles that try to educate and validate grievers on this experience and I do have some that I think could be a help. I will include those below. I'm glad you're here looking for help and I hope you can find some support and connection with others. Sometimes that's all that can make the difference, especially in the beginning. Please take care. Here are some things for you to read: https://www.griefincommon.com/blog/sudden-loss-5-ways-its-different-then-expected-loss/ https://www.griefincommon.com/blog/howtosleepbetterwhengrieving/ https://www.griefincommon.com/blog/on-grief-5-things-only-the-newly-bereaved-understand/ https://www.griefincommon.com/blog/what-to-do-if-you-dont-know-what-to-do-after-loss/ https://www.griefincommon.com/blog/losing-focus-lacking-concentration-in-grief/ https://www.griefincommon.com/blog/grief-roadblocks-let-go-tough-emotions/
