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What do I do now?

Discussion in 'Loss of Spouse' started by Sandra Bickley, May 30, 2018.

  1. Sandra Bickley

    Sandra Bickley New Member

    I lost my Husband in December they say it gets easier I find it's getting harder how do I go on? Our 29th Anniversary is June 4th feel like my heart's being ripped out I just want to be with him.
     
  2. Mary0128

    Mary0128 Well-Known Member

    My husband of 31 years passed of cancer 5 months ago, our anniversary was May 2nd. It was a tough day, I went for a walk , the same route we used to take together. I tried to memorialize him by writing a letter to him. It was difficult it made me bawl but I felt a little better after. I then took the letter and placed it in my garden and planted a beautiful flower over it. It may sound silly, but it helped me find some peace.
     
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  3. Cathy H.

    Cathy H. Member

    I lost my husband of 28 years, and our 29th Anniversary would have been July 1st. He's gone 10 months now and I'm still angry. My emotions have changed and some things have improved, but how could he leave me his mess to clean up? I feel hopeful for somethings, but can't get over the loss of time we didn't have together. We were hoping for time in retirement that never came. I like the garden/letter idea. I write a note to my husband because no one else wants to hear what I have to share. Feels like no one wants to know me. I am going on and I am crying less. I am still living 1 day at a time like a recovering addict, but I don't get to enjoy an indulgence or addition and I get by 1 day or 1 moment at a time. It's getting me through.
     
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  4. Carmela Rule

    Carmela Rule Member

    Hi Cathy .. So sorry for your loss its been 10mons for me .. 30yrs of life shared I'm get angry at him for dying cause that was not the plan just like you I'm left with the mess to clean up & now add myself to that list. He was not in good health but death .. Caught us off gaurd . I find myself reliving last 3mons of his life .. And just like you I write letters to him all the time. And I have heard how I need to let him rest he wouldn't want me to be crying & sad how I need to think of the good memories we had .. Well unless you have been through this you can't possiblly understand . so i find myself withdrawing from people . And it is and will be one day at a time ..
     
    Davis likes this.