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Trying to find a job after multiple recent losses

Discussion in 'Coping After a Sudden Loss' started by Beth19, Dec 3, 2020.

  1. Beth19

    Beth19 New Member

    My younger sister (and best friend) passed away at hospice on November 14th after a 6 year battle with brain cancer. Also, our mom passed away from heart problems in July. These two people were my two main support people in my life. My dad loves and supports me, but he’s rather stoic about the whole thing and says keeping busy working outdoors and doing projects inside is helping him immensely.

    My dad is concerned about me, as I should be looking for another job. I worked 19 years in IT and was recently downsized, with my last day being 9/1. Even though my mom passed, I was making progress in my job search in September and October and was having interviews, muddling through and doing my best. Then my sister started getting particularly bad and I needed to focus on her (I was seven years older than her and she really didn’t have anyone else besides my dad). I have a career coach, who says that I just need to be more positive and really sell myself in interviews with the hiring manager. However, that’s the very last thing I feel like doing lately. I know that every month that goes by without finding another job is detrimental and I know I’m letting my dad down, but some days it’s all I can do to just get dressed and do my homework for an economics class I’m taking. I really need to get my head in the game to get another job, but struggling now... what can I do?
     
  2. hfmw

    hfmw New Member

    are you financially stable currently? Do you need to immediately find work or be at risk of losing your home/food? If not, what if you volunteer somewhere parttime. or find a part time job, while you work through grief. Then when you're ready to go back to your career, you can easily explain the employment gap by saying you were grieving and needed space.
     
  3. It’s very difficult to need to find employment when you are grieving for one loss, let alone two. I agree with hfmw, if you can financially swing it, find something part time. In my youth I would have thrown my self into my work, but these days I know the importance of self care, and it’s critical to care for you. It may require a necessary conversation with your dad, explains to him how you are grieving, and that you need his support until you are well enough to work full time. Sending you hugs, I can’t imagine losing two women from your immediate family within months of each other.