Mark K,
I am so sorry for your loss of Wendy. Cancer is so relentless. Nadine, my wife also passed from cancer.
There are no good answers, when we lose the one we loved. What makes it even worse is our hopes are sometimes up and down as we wait for recovery. My own wife was on a transplant list 3 times until the cancer came back with a passion. It is not easy to face the coming loss of the mother of your children. I had two sons by Nadine, they took her loss hard.
I agree, watching Wendy slowly give way to cancer is an awful image we don’t ever wish to remember. But, Wendy was with you over two decades. Through your love you brought three children into this world. Of course the most difficult thing will be guiding your children forward in life.
This is where you lean on family and friends, to help you cope and to slowly help all of you to eventually get beyond your grief. It won’t be easy, it will take time and many tears and difficult decisions. Not just you, but all of your children will need guidance as well. Children, though resilient, are also fragile and keep so much pain inside them. So if you can seek counselling for all of you it would help enormously.
Mark, my wife was the same till the end. She had such an acute mind. She knew everyone, even those from her past. Each person that came had their special time with her. I felt inadequate on how amazing a memory she had. During the last day, all who were in her room, saw a hospice nurse come into her room with a prayer and candle in her hands.
She took the candle to the window, lit it, then came back to us all and read the prayer, the end of life prayers. All I can is, you couldn’t move, it was hard to breath and when it was finished tears were flowing freely in us all. When I realized she had taken her last breath I was standing by her beside. I kissed her and her sister hugged me. There is more but we all have our bittersweet memories.
Mark, I hate the separation we all are now facing. There is no promise of what tomorrow will bring and we all do the best we can to make it through each day.
Please just remember, Wendy will always be with you in spirit and try to share so many pleasant times with your children. It will take time. It won’t be easy. But, just remember Wendy and all she meant to all of you will be in your hearts and minds forever.
As time passes, please talk as much as you wish. There are no limits, and speak freely and frankly. We will be here to listen. Peace be with you today.
-david
I hope you like this song
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