My Fiancée passed unexpectedly April 3rd, 2019

Discussion in 'Coping After a Sudden Loss' started by Donna Tibbitts, May 11, 2019.

  1. Donna Tibbitts

    Donna Tibbitts New Member

    My name is Donna. I am 38 years old and my Fiancée was 49. I knew him ever since I was 6 or 7 years old and we began our relationship almost 6 years ago. I have lost everything. He was my world and my everything. He was my best friend. He died of pure negligence (in the process of suing both hospitals) my baby died a very horrific and tragic death and suffered for 3 days non stop... I can’t eat which I have lost 50 pounds since April 3rd. I can’t sleep as you can see I am still awake... exhausted but can’t sleep. I cry all the time.. I can’t function in my daily tasks.. I sought help through my PCP but she is no real help so here I am... I just wish I could disappear. I pray every night for God just to please take me home so I can be with my Fiancée for eternity and apparently he isn’t answering that prayer either... so here I am
     
  2. ReneeLight

    ReneeLight Active Member

    Dear Donna, I am very sorry to hear about your fiancé. The first few months are a blur and you’re in shock. Slowly in time you’ll feel a bit better. I also went to a therapist and she just wanted to know what my plans are now. She didn’t help or understand I don’t have any plans now. Just living day by day. I wish you well. Even though it’s hard, try to take care of yourself. Your fiancé would want you to.
     
  3. Laine B

    Laine B New Member

    I know exactly what you mean My Ryan died in car accident in December I have felt lost, worthless, wish I would die I do not want to live without him I have dogs...they have kept me going. I know it sounds small but it's the reason I am still here. I too lost weight either sleep too much or not enough. We have no other option but to survive. The pain is unbearable but I hope that in the end there is something good in life to make all this worth it
     
  4. Kenw

    Kenw New Member

    Laine B, there were plenty of times where I no longer cared if I lived or not but like you as small as it sounds my dog is most of the reason I am still here. Everyone heals differently, for me its been 15 months since my fiance suddenly passed and I have realized the pain will never go away but there are periods of time where I feel almost normal again. You will eventually begin to do some of the things you used to do without realizing it but it takes time.
     
  5. Laurie S.

    Laurie S. New Member

    Friends,
    I also suddenly lost my husband in January. He was 52. We have been married for 28 years: together for 32. We lost a child to brain cancer almost 11 years ago, and the pain seems insurmountable. When my son died, I think I stayed in bed 99% of each day for over 4 months. When my husband died I was left with a lot of debt - so now my focus is on work instead of healing (maybe work is my way to heal). I am so angry at him for leaving me alone, feel so guilty that he died alone while I was at work, and so lost because he was the love of my life. I drink a lot, eat a lot, and just put one foot in front of the other to get through each day. I don't know how much longer I want to exist this way.