I'm 21 years old and I lost my dad may 16th of this year because of a reckless driver and was basically squished on impact. I live in Tennessee and he lived in texas. When I got the call that morning, everything since then has been different. Due to the job I had at the time I was unable to go to his funeral, neither me nor my sister did, but she wasnt as close to him as I was. I think me not being able to go has made this process so much harder. I cant sleep, I cry nonstop, and I have physical pains like never before. Everything has seemed to progressively gotten worse since he has died. I've had relationship issues as well. I feel stuck and down in the gutters all the time. It seems like after the first few days of him being dead everyone all of sudden cared about me, but that only lasted for a little while. It's been almost 4 months and I cant recall the last member of family/friend that I have to check on me or even mention his name. I understand everyone goes through grief differently and has their own way of comfort, but I also believe that a normal family would try to be there for each other. I have had no one to talk to or just even cry to, and it has made it worse for me and now I feel stuck in a deep depression of not wanting to continue on my life without him. He was the back bone to everything in my life.