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Lost my wife to cancer.

Discussion in 'Loss of Spouse' started by JohnFS, Jun 8, 2019.

  1. Dave33085

    Dave33085 Well-Known Member

    It seems like when it rains, it pours doesn't it? It was only a few months after my wife died that my mother was diagnosed with multiple myeloma. It was a real struggle going through the surgery and chemo. Although she was 82, she lived like she was 52. This really slowed her down though. Thank God she just got good news yesterday that they have the cancer under control. I hope you both get good news for Cassie and Jessi. Some days it seems like good news will never come. My prayers go out for both of you
     
  2. Didee

    Didee Member

    Thank you Dave. I hope you are having a good day.
     
  3. Dave33085

    Dave33085 Well-Known Member

    So far so good. Awful hot out today though. Going to get hotter by Saturday. Not looking forward to that. Hope the surgery on Cassie goes as planned. Keep me posted
     
  4. Didee

    Didee Member

    I live in Kentucky we have been a heat wave since July 7, and it is supposed to continue until sometime next week. I am so glad I don't have to work outside.
     
  5. Dave33085

    Dave33085 Well-Known Member

    I live in Southwest PA and we also are in the middle of a heatwave. Heat index is supposed to be 106 on Friday. I'm a cook and work in kitchen in an assisted living/retreat center with no A/C. Not looking forward to the weekend.
     
  6. Didee

    Didee Member

    Dave, take care and remember to hydrate. I hope you have a way to cool off when you get out of work.
     
  7. Dave33085

    Dave33085 Well-Known Member

    Thanks Didee,I just ride home with the A/C blasting all the way home. I don't have central air in my home but I have a couple window units and a ceiling fan and that does a pretty good job of making it comfortable. How did the surgery go?
     
  8. Didee

    Didee Member

    She was still in surgery when I called at 4 PM. The surgeon was going to call me when they were through. Still waiting and I have no nails left.
     
  9. azmum

    azmum New Member

    hi john, your post really resonated with me. i lost my 28 year old husband to cancer as well. we were fighting gbmIV; i kept up hope until the very end, even when everyone around us knew what the outcome would be. we have 2 little ones (aged 5 & 2), & were trying for one more to complete our family. i understand exactly what you mean about waking up in the morning. every day i hope this is a nightmare that i will wake up from. i am trying to carry on as normally as possible for our kids, but i feel utterly broken. i just wanted to let you know that you aren't alone. if you ever want to talk, please let me know.
     
  10. JohnFS

    JohnFS Well-Known Member

    Hello azmum, I am so very sorry for your loss, he was so young. Thank you for reaching out to me. The more posts you read the more you will realize we all kind of resonate at the same frequency of sadness, some more and some less but all still overwhelming. My wife was my everything. It’s been 3 months yesterday since my wife passing and it still just shuts me down sometimes, but I have to admit chatting with people on this site has helped me a great deal in understanding that this pain will always be with us but it has become a little easier to handle; but every day I still have to force myself out of bed and debate if I will go into work or not, I usually end up going to work so it keeps me busy. Azmum you will be broken for a while and it hurts but your kids need their mom also. My heart and prayer goes out to you. If you need to talk I am here also, we can all relate and talking does help.
     
    Dave33085 likes this.
  11. JohnFS

    JohnFS Well-Known Member

    Hey Dave and Didee, it was pretty hot here today also, but I’m in the middle of the desert here in the west part of Texas. Just picture a tumbleweed rolling across the dry desert with an oil rig in the background that gives a good picture of my area.
    Didee I hope Cassie’s surgery was a success. I put a prayer in for her at church tonight as I do for all of us here.
    Jessi is doing good with the steroid she is as hungry as ever and eating good, I did go to soft food so it’s kind of a treat for her, but what ever I give her I have to give to Buster also. He’s a funny dog, short stocky pit bull body with a beagle hound dog head.
     
  12. Dave33085

    Dave33085 Well-Known Member

    Hey John, glad to hear Jessi is doing better! Yeah, I know what Texas is like, my buddy and best man at our wedding lives in Dallas and my wife and I actually honeymooned in South Padre island. Beautiful state but it is hot! I get a lot of laughs when I tell people that we honeymooned in Texas. Everyone expects something more exotic
     
  13. JohnFS

    JohnFS Well-Known Member

    Haha, I’ve been to South Padre Island, not very exotic but was a good time, of course I had some good times in Dallas also but hated the traffic. Texas! You can drive 10 hours and still be in the same state.
     
  14. Dave33085

    Dave33085 Well-Known Member

    Back in 1985, South Padre island was very quiet. I think the only motel available was a Holiday inn. And you could drive on the beach. Watched the sun set while sitting in the car hood a couple times while we were down there. I understand that now it's a pretty big party town
     
  15. Didee

    Didee Member

    Good Morning John, Glad to here Jessi is doing better. Cassie surgery went off without a hitch. She had 2 discs repaired and was wake when the Surgeon called me last night @ 6:30. He was going to give her some heavy sedation for the night and then get her up this morning to walk. I am suppose to get a progress report later this morning. Thank you for the prayers. I hope you have a good day. Stay cool there in Texas. We are expecting Texas temps today: 94 degrees and 80% humidity.
     
  16. Dave33085

    Dave33085 Well-Known Member

    Didee, Glad to hear that Cassie's surgery went well. I hope it's a quick recovery and she is back home with you soon
     
  17. Didee

    Didee Member

    Thank you Dave. The earliest she will be able to come home is tomorrow. I am going to see here this evening though.
     
  18. JohnFS

    JohnFS Well-Known Member

    Hey Didee, I hope your girl Cassie is back home and happy to be back with you.
     
  19. Dave33085

    Dave33085 Well-Known Member

    Hey John, I think I saw an armadillo in my yard today and a tumbleweed rolling down my street it's so hot out. Hope you are out of the oven by now
     
  20. JohnFS

    JohnFS Well-Known Member

    Still in the oven here; 103 today and I was out working in it for a while, working on my sprinklers in the back yard. I would turn them on to test them out and I would go stand in the middle of them with Jessi, she loves water. My other dog Buster will go through the doggy door in the shop and then poke his head out and watch whenever I turn the water on. You would think on these hot days he would like to cool off but he doesn’t like getting wet at all. I keep 2 kiddie pools in the shade full of fresh cool water for them. You have to watch out for the armadillos, they can get pretty mean. There was a guy in town that use to spray shellac on tumbleweeds and sell them up north during the Christmas season, use to be kind of a fad.