Lost my dad, never really had a mother

I lost my dad in January 2 days after his birthday. He had pancreatic cancer and was diagnosed in December. We where told 6/9 months we had 8 weeks.
I was close with my dad as he was everything to me. I have an extremely complicated relationship with my mother involving neglect and abuse. I haven't spoken to her in about 3 years.
Tonight I just feel broken, my family's going through hell not just with the loss of my dad, my daughter was raped by someone she trusted, my brothers best friend committed suicide and I'm trying to balance my familys and my own finances and so much more. This lockdown is making things so much harder I'm trying so hard to keep it together.

I don't think I can cope for much longer, I've tried to reach out for help but my friends dont understand and as I'm not suicidal the mental health services here don't want to know.

Help

 

Kiwi,

So very sorry for the loss of your father and the broken relationship with your mother. Oh my God, and your daughter was molested is disheartening, and your brother is suffering the loss of his best friend. Truly a family in crisis. I hope you and your family can seek professional counseling and possibly see a psychiatrist and/or a priest. This is something you never wish to handle alone, you, your daughter, and your brother.

I too have lost my parents, my wife, both my sisters were molested when they were younger, and my closest uncle committed suicide and so many more. My family needed help throughout life, my two sons did as well. It was so personal and hard to overcome without professional help.

I suffered depression, was treated and I hope you will look out for your mindset and well-being. Loss and life bring so many situations will so little answers that we all sometimes need help and should seek it. Trying to do it by ourselves is so very hard.

This isolation is trying on all of us. Sometimes this virus even though deadly, just does not seem to match the despair we face in our own lives. By separating us from support we are left to the phone and the internet.

This broken road of grief that we each travel is not an easy one, and so if you can reach out as you are now doing to strangers that is a form of support. All of here have seen and experienced so much with our lives, some similar, but if we allow yourself to open up it can help you cope in the long run.

I found this site in my desperation to feel better inside. I am glad I did. I hope you will continue to reach out and open up. Life is so hard to face. The loneliness and emptiness we face are not easy to meet and overcome. It just takes time and a willingness to start to heal, and to have faith in yourself. To me I have always had my faith to help me.

Please take care, watch out for yourself, your daughter, your brother, and just know that you are no longer alone. Peace be with you.

-david

This music is for you



.