So I lost my dad a month ago to stage 4 colon cancer. Everything just feels numb and I don't really care. The biggest thing I'm worried about is not caring at my job. Before when Dad was just ok and not sickly yet, I would put in 12 to 16 hours a day. Now I'm lucky if I stay there past 8 hours. I was telling my s/o about how I just don't care how the store looks when I leave (I'm a store manager at a convenience store). His had wondered why, dumbly. I smarted off asking him what he thought had changed in the past month. He replied, "You can't blame everything on that. I know he was important but we need to move on." We only started dating when Dad got super sick and weighed 160lbs. Yet before he was diagnosed he was pushing closer to 300lbs. He never got to see him at his best and never understood how wonderful of a father he was.