Hospice puts out a list of how grief may present. We can read that list and likely more than one symptom we know. Several in combination. There were about 50 on the list. I did, acute loneliness, confusion, buckets of tears, insomnia, overthinking or obsessional thinking and overtalking to a point of driving my friends crazy. anger is present but I see that as raw nerves and zero tolerance. So much of that was the demands that caretaking is. Grieving them while doing an impossible job that stretched us to or limits. Then there were some on the list I was grateful not to have. Those might be a physical heart attack. chest pains, anxiety interrupted sleep with nightmares. Then there were the ones I would have liked to experience. Seeing her in dreams or some experience their presence in the room. The jealousy was also listed. I thought not that one. I would guess that is just seeing what we lost and being reminded of what we lost. We have a life to fill but are broken and clueless about how to do that. Our person was everything and now there is nothing. More than that we are hardly able to get through a day not consumed by sorrow and pain. There is sea level but we start below sea level. So the climb out begins. I knew this would be difficult but not nearly how difficult. I am mind-blown over that. There are countless things that help a little. I have done so many. The best are other people that can listen well or Have wonderful lives they share with us. Better does come just slowly and sometimes in unexpected ways. We can be proactive but healing time is just that. I wish us all well and better. Paul M.