Homesick

Discussion in 'Loss of Spouse' started by Mary0128, May 10, 2018.

  1. Mary0128

    Mary0128 Active Member

    I'm finally getting to projects that were left unfinished. It's been almost 18 months since my Jeff's passing. Still miss him everyday, still cry at times, usually it catches me off guard, I cry at the weirdest things. Finishing our deck this weekend, and then working on getting the mulch on the flower beds. These are projects that we planned on doing together. Still feeling homesick, wish he was here.
     
  2. Mary0128

    Mary0128 Active Member

    This is the 2nd fourth without my Jeff. The last Fourth we had together we had a wonderful time at the lake with the whole family. Jeff left early, he was tired, it was the beginning of the end. Jeff received his esophageal cancer diagnosis on 7/18/2017. Six months and 10 days later, he was gone. He is everywhere and nowhere at the same time. I miss him, this holiday will never be the same.
     
  3. Mary0128

    Mary0128 Active Member

    1 year ago yesterday, I laid my husband to rest. He passed 1/28/18, but we had to wait for the ground to thaw before his burial. I went to his grave, cleaned the stone, and cried. This was the last of my firsts. I feel like the seconds are just as hard, but each day I am learning to cope with this exhausting grief. I never know what is going to be my trigger. It could be a song, a scent, a flower blooming in a field, a bird soaring above my head. If I could only see, touch, hold him one more time.
     
  4. Mary0128

    Mary0128 Active Member

    August.... what a beautiful month. Memories flood my mind. Camping trips, weekends on the lake, picnics at the ocean, and your Birthday. I miss those days. I miss us. I miss how it was and how we were. I am left with these wonderful memories, we'll reminisce together someday. Jeff, I will Love you always.
     
  5. Mary0128

    Mary0128 Active Member

    I saw a rainbow this morning, it made my heart feel light again, Miss you Jeff, Love you More