My wife lost her battle with lung cancer seven months ago. She died at home under hospice care. She was diagnosed in October 2019. That was the day that my world was turned upside down. The irony of all this is that I am a hospice registered nurse. During the day I would visit terminally ill patients and their families and then come home to care for my wife. During the last eight months before she passed our love for each other deepened and grew stronger. I miss her terribly.
So very sorry for your loss. What an amazing person you are to be a hospice nurse and then to also have cared for your wife. You have been through so much. I truly understand how your love for each other deepened and grew stronger, my husband became sick for several years where he was weakening and deteriorating in front of me. What we had his last year was pure love, a strong bond where nothing material mattered, only each day together because we knew there was a limit.
I suppose if there is an upside to all of this is we had an opportunity to realize how deep our love was for each other and that the minor things went away.
Lost my spouse of 23 years To AML, he was told he had it in September and was gone 10/ 07/2020. It was the most painful thing i have ever seen. He just wasted away to nothing. I lost my first Husband in 94 due to car accident we was married 22 years,So i grieve for both.. Its the hardest thing i have ever done. Iam so lodt
I am truly sorry for loss. I can not imagine the loss of 2 husbands . The bible says '' I will not put on you more than you can handle''. Sometimes there are just no answers but many questions. I feel for you to have this happen to you twice for all I know once is a enough. I know and we all know that feeling of being lost for we all lost the loves of our lives and we wonder what if anything will clear this fog that I see every day . Will there be joy or happiness of any kind in my life again. Will our hearts be healed for we never thought our hearts could be so broken.It has now been 13 months since I lost my wife to cancer and I just don't know ,there are days when I laugh at the simple things like when I bump my head on the liftback on my wife's car,she always told me to watch my head I bet I have bumped my head 10 times ,you would think by now I would duck a little lower it's not like I have a big head ,she would just say" way to go stupid". Then those grief bursts can happen at any time. I fight for it's a battle everyday ,all I know I get it,we all do .we are the safe people we are fellow sufferers If you could look into my eyes you would see that. A long journey I believe this is and so unfortunate also ,I don't know what lies ahead ,somewhat scary but am trying to trust God , even my faith has taken a direct hit. Never give in never give up,it's a fight just to keep it together, but fight we will ,warriors ,be strong and courageous.
My name is Erick I’m having a hard time mywife passed away February 5 2021 after a 15 month battle with aml leukemia at the age of 40 years old .We were together 16 years two kids 11-13 and she had one which I raised 21 yearsold .I feel lost after the burial it’s been downhill for me I do what I have to do for my kids because they depend on me .She was firstdiagnosed with aml on dec 25 2019 after a normal blood work routine no signs no symptoms.That same day was rushed to thehospital because her blood work showed she had 80 percent blast in her blood which is leukemia cancer .She went on to receive chemotherapy got into remission cancer free and on June 4 2020 she had a transplant atSloan Kettering nyc.At the end of October cancer came back transplant had failed she had relapsed.Was put on a clinical trail and itworked until middle of January if it had worked she would have been receiving another transplant in the third week of February but she never made it .When the trial stopped working every thing went bad real fast and in the end it was to much for her .I was with her the night before she died we all still had hope faith andbelieve she was going to make it .On February 5 as I was getting ready to go see her the doctorcalled that her stop beating they had brought back her beat back 20 minutes later he called again that she was gone that this time no heart beat .I living life but I’m not there I deal with ptsd,anxiety,stress etc it’s all to much sometimes I don’t know how have I made itthrough these days it’s been difficult andcontinues to get harder most of the time .Myheart and soul are in pain I don’t understandlife and have so many questions I watched the love of my life struggle emotionally mentallyphysically and at the end it was just to much Imiss her .
Erick, it's been 4 months since my husband died of cancer. I'm dealing with what you are going through so all I can say right now is keep posting. The forum has been such a help for me knowing I have forum friends who understand. I don't feel so alone. But it's hard, hang in there, I'm trying, we all try. It's only been since Feb you lost her you're in shock. Everyone's journey through grief is different and there is no time schedule for healing. Someone told me you never heal but the pain is lessened. Keep reading the forum you may find some comfort knowing you're not alone.
Broken soul 54. You have lost an unbearable loss of two. I can't imagine. To relate somewhat, I lost my son age 49 Sept 2019 to sepsis infection due to complications. Then 1 yr and 3 months later in 2020 Nov I lost my husband to cancer. We were married 39 years. I'm still in shock. You may think this is crazy but in July 2019 I lost my cat of 15 years and now my other cat is very ill. I can't lose him, he's my buddy and keeps me getting up every day. Keep posting here you will find so many people sharing and caring. To me typing in this forum is like writing in a journal, it helps the pain for a moment.
