Declined company for today, but feeling guilty.

Today is 2 months since I lost my son in law. He and I were very close.

A friend wanted to come spend new years eve with me. But I declined. I know I am not good company right now. I am sad. I just feel like I need to get through this quietly.
But I feel guilty for declining. My friend lives alone as well. But it doesn't feel right to be celebrating NYE. It feels disrespectful.
I think I just need to honor his life, and acknowledge his passing quietly today.

I appreciate any input.

❤

 

Stay authentic with what is true for you

 

You need to do what feels right for you and not feel guilty about your decision.

 

I am sorry for your loss. Unanimous - in your grief, you need to do what feels right and respectful to your son-in-law. You can always call your friend when you are feeling a bit better and get together when it feels right. If you are honest about your feelings, she will hopefully understand. I have a hard time being in a room filled with happy people when my emotions are so unpredictable. Prayers for your peace of mind.

 

I am sorry for your loss.
Don't allow anyone to make you feel guilty.
You do what you can. If people don't understand its their problem not yours.

 

It’s so hard for others to understand the feeling of being lost. Not wanting to eat can’t sleep can’t really do much. It’s awful. My only only support is through prayer. I don’t know what else to say. Pray that all your pain and sorrow will be lifted so you can find some peace in life. That’s what I try to do but not always doing a good job at it. Blessings for 2021

 

Yes - alone in a room full of people. Trying to focus on work, family, shopping, chores, errands - all the while conscious that something - grief - is occupying your mind and distracting you. I had a hard time reconnecting to God through prayer at first. It is getting easier. I wake up in the morning and ask myself, ‘if I choose to live this day, what am I going to do with it?’ I say good morning to Michael, tell him I love and miss him, thank god for keeping him safe, and try to find purpose in the day. Sometimes, I am just going through the motions, sometimes I am better. Praying for you too to have some peace.

 

Thank you all for your thoughtful replies. Thank you also for understanding.
❤

 

Keep reaching out