Unthinkable loss of my little brother

My heart is still so raw. I am the oldest of four kids. We have always been very close. I have two little brothers and one little sister. My parents fought a lot growing up so my siblings and I were pretty much best friends. I helped raise them due to large amount of years between us. My little brother Peyton just turned 18 in May. He was going into the marines, and he had his whole life ahead of him. On June 19th he was on his way to work on his motorcycle when a car failed to yield because they thought they had time to make the turn. They didn’t and he was killed instantly. The accident report says that if this man had waited just two seconds, Pey would have made it. I am so angry at this person. I miss my little brother like mad. It feels like my life doesn’t fit me anymore.

 

Sorry, thats rough. No words can make semse out of something that doesmt make sense. My little sister passed suddenly 4 months ago, i am glad to have found this site, to have others who know and understand the emotional, physical and mental anquish we are going thru. They help me to know im not alone and that there is no time period for my grief and all the feelings we have are normal and there is no one way to grieve. I hope you find that also.

 

I lost my little brother in April. He fell down some stairs and was pronounced “brain dead”. I lost my younger sister in 2012. It’s only myself now. I think of suicide every single night as I can’t cope with this. I loved them very much. We had the same mother but differentfather. Michael was the “Golden child”. I feel like I don’t even exist anymore. I haven’t talked to my parents since his memorial birthday bash on August 4th. They released balloons and didn’t even include me. My brother donated several organs, and they recently met the recipients. Again, I was left out. The pain is unbearable...