Orphan at 42

Discussion in 'Loss of Both Parents' started by lagrieco, Aug 18, 2021.

  1. lagrieco

    lagrieco New Member

    I lost my dad when I was 15. My mom just died. I am confused and don't know who I am. Does anyone have any feelings about identity loss?
    Treecy and Calixicana like this.
  2. Dhall1980

    Dhall1980 New Member

    I understand. I just lost my mom on september 24th and i turned 41 on oct 2. My mom was the world to me. I have no parents, no girlfriend, wife or kids. I am just so alone and hopeless.
  3. Treecy

    Treecy New Member

    I lost my mom on 1995 and my dad in November 2022. My grief has become what the doctors have told me as emotional stress, and as a result I've lost my voice.
  4. Jessie1258

    Jessie1258 New Member

    Yes. I lost my two life lines to this world and I feel so empty and numb. My Mom & Dad passed in 2022, 9 weeks apart. I'm 43 y/o, an only child and feel like an ophran. My outlook on life has completed changed and things that used to be important, seem so irrevelant now. I feel empty and am mad at the world. I'll never see them again and that is what overwhlems me the most. Nothing can prepare you for the loss of a Parent and it's a void that will never be filled. I am sorry you are hurting.
    Nicenin likes this.
  5. Nicenin

    Nicenin New Member

    I feel exactly the same as you. My Mom died after a nine year illness on April 1st 2021 and my Dad died suddenly exactly 18 months later on October 1st 2022. I have only one sibling who does not communicate and I have no partner. When I reached out for support, "friends" became very judgmental and aggressive. Truthfully when my Dad died he took my soul with him and I'm just a shell of a human being now.
  6. bigjimbob2000

    bigjimbob2000 New Member

    Man do I fell your pain!
  7. VNicole12

    VNicole12 New Member

    I found myself an orphan in my 30s, and never would have imagined losing both of my parents at a relatively young age. It completely changed me as a person - better in some ways but also bitter because I still need them my life and they aren't here. Then I look at others my age who still have one or both of their parents and ask Why? Why did mine die and theirs live?
  8. Alexa21

    Alexa21 New Member

    I think feelings around identity loss are completely normal, especially for those who have strong family roots in terms of their identity. For 29 years I had tried being the person my parents wanted me to be. Then they passed 2 months apart and while that was 2 years ago now, I'm still trying to find myself. I joke that it's a mid-life crisis but really, it's a lack of direction. At the same time, there is something 'freeing' about not having to meet their expectations or face their disappointment. Life is already hard, losing loved ones is harder, but finding yourself can be a gift that you give yourself.