Losing both parents 8 months apart

Hi, my name is Ashley. I recently lost my mom April 15, then my dad November 27th. My mom was diagnosed with multiple myeloma (cancer of the blood) beginning of 2023 and they thought they caught it soon enough to be able to treat it/ keep it at bay since it will never go away. I love in post falls Idaho and she lived in auburn. I only knew what she told me as far as treatments and everything. Fast forward to 2024 and she had gone to the hospital in federal way and found out she was in heart and liver failure but never told us. We had picked her up from auburn just before my my brother's b day April 10th and by April 13th she was in the hospital with them telling us she's dying and we had no clue. By April 15th she was gone.
My dad took it the hardest even tho they were divorced. My dad had been fighting c.o.p.d,enphazima, heart failure and lung cancer. He started to take a turn for the not so good side but got better. He got a cold just before he passed. Next thing you know I lost my dad. Both my parents 8 months apart. I'm lost, my husband is such a sweet heart but he has no idea how to help, my little brother seems to be doing just fine and I'm over here spinning out of control. I'm only 39 and thought I had so much more time with them. If you made it this far thank you for reading. I just needed to get this is my chest in a place I hope understands.

 

Dearest Ashley, you have suffered two great losses. One of them was completely unexpected and caught you off guard without any warning. It is only right to grieve. You loved these two people and the grief is a sign of how much they meant to you.
Be kind and good to yourself. Don't compare your grief to anyone else's. There is no right or wrong way to grieve. Only do things which are helpful to your well being and peace of mind. Don't try to conform to other's wishes or judgments.
Your husband is not experiencing the same feelings as you, so you are right, he does not know how to help you. He wants to but just doesn't know how. He just wants to see you well.
Look to God who can help you. We humans can only do so much for each other in the area of helping each other, but Jesus knows us intimately and He has experienced the same pain you are suffering. When He went to the tomb of Lazarus, the scriptures say he wept and they also say he has compassion. If you will reach out to Him, He will comfort and strengthen you-I know because He did this for me after out great tragedy.
Stay in touch.
Chris

 

Ashley- Your story is so similar to mine. I unfortunately cant offer any help bc I am dealing with the same thing. I dont want to overs peak or be disrespectful. Have you listened to star shopping by little peep? Its not a rap song its about the stars being your loved ones. Im not a hippy I swear. I found the song when I went to rehab after they passed. "All of these starts have a reason" I always listen to it and look at the sky and I know that my parents are looking down on me.

 

That makes 3 of us in here. I found this site by googling "lost both parents within 7 months". My mom 7 months ago from Alzheimers & my dad had diabetes heart failure. I've been living with just him, providing care for 6 years. I woke up on his birthday at 7:30am and found him dead on the kitchen floor. I've been having to deal with so much on my own that I've barely had time to grieve. Needing to find my own place now, still working on that. Settling the estate. Selling his truck. He told us he pre paid his cremation when he did my mother's but there was no record of it so I had to deal with all of that too. Let's start our connection here & lend our ears & eyes to one another. If anyone has WhatsApp we can chat there too if we give each other's info. Peace for now & take care!