I’m alone

I feel so alone. My mother in law died. She was my best friend, like a mom to me. And because my true mom isn’t in my life, I feel lonelier than ever. She left me , her two boys and her husband . I’m the only girl now, and I find myself uneasy when I am with my family because I have no one to sit next to or laugh with or cook with. My husband says to just hide it. But that might work for men but I can’t help feeling like I don’t know who I am since I lost my best friend , my cheerleader my Vicky .

 

I'm sorry you feel so alone and that your immediate surroundings are only increasing it. I have a similar problem, the people I lost were the ones I could cook with, exchange family photos with, that were super interested in me and my kids. Everyone I have now often leaves me out or acts indifferent. Sometimes the loneliness is unbearable and yes, men can often seem to just write it off. The main person I share my true feelings and family photos with now is my therapist.

 

I can definitely relate to the 'cheerleader' part., and also that the main person I talk about deeper stuff with is my therapist. I do have a lot of good people in my life, but my mom was my biggest supporter and the one who really 'got me'. We had dinner at her house once a week. I hate cooking, so having someone make food for me is one of my favorite things. She always gave me the leftovers and I kept something from our last meal in our fridge for months. I couldn't throw it out ... LONG after it was inedible. My husband finally threw it out or it would probably still be there.

I hope you're feeling better today. I know some days are better than others for me. My mom died on December 23, 2020 following a major but routine surgery. So the holidays were not great, but I'm REALLY feeling it today.

 

I was very close to my grandma then she passed away, I just feel I lose a irreplaceable mother figure. I have a missing part that I cannot get it back in rest of my life. Sorry for your loss, I know it’s really hard to be deal with.