I lost my Dad a little over a month ago, July 1st, 2018. I am 30... he was only 62. It was very sudden - I had no idea what was coming. He hasn’t been feeling well, but it wasn’t uncommon for him to have a cold or sinus issues - I didn’t think anything of it. I am getting married October 6th. He died 3 months before my wedding day. I am dealing with his loss, I planned a funeral and I am planning a wedding all at the same time. I don’t know how to deal with the fact that my dad won’t be there to walk me down the aisle...he was here and now he is gone, right before what is supposed to be the best day of my life, and what was supposed to be the most proud day for my dad. I am the youngest of 3 siblings, I live in the next state over from my home state where my Dad and my 2 older brothers live. (Lived, for Dad). I have had to step up and take care of much of the estate matters, and I also am having to deal with the dissolution of his business, which breaks my heart because I was going to be his successor but I thought we had more time... I am just lost every day. I can’t make it to work on time - I can hardly make myself get out of bed. Luckily I have an amazing boss who has been very understanding, and an amazing fiancé who has been very understanding and beyond helpful and supportive. But I get to work, I sit there, I stare and have trouble staying on task. I bounce from work things to trying to settle things for Dad, to trying to finish scheduling wedding things. Everything runs together and there is so much to do... I literally feel crazy most of the time. And I have no filter anymore. I am usually very cool calm and collected, now I can’t hold it together. I say whatever is on my mind, I have no tact... I just wonder how long this all can last this way. I feel like I’m losing my mind. I am so sad, so lost, so angry... I’m in disbelief and then it all becomes so real... it’s a vicious cycle. How do I deal? I don’t know what to do.