I am new here and my heart goes out to all of you. After the sudden loss of my 3 children and their father (my whole family) from a plane crash I found a grief counselor who was amazing and got me through some of the darkest hours of my life. Her name is Ashley Davis-Bush. Go to You Tube to watch her free videos about grief. She lives in New Hampshire but does Skype appointments. I can't say enough good things about her! Each of your journeys are unique and amazing and I am sending you positive thoughts and love.
Dear Karen: First let me extend my most heartfelt condolences on the loss of your three children and your husband. To lose everyone all at once is truly devastating. I can certainly relate because I have also lost everyone in my family, though not all at the same time. My Dad-12 years ago, my Mom last May and my daughter 15 years ago. I am also permanently estranged from my only sibling and niece, and my divorce just became final in June. I was with him for 25 years, married for 19 years and on XMAS Eve 2014 I found out he was having an affair for the past 10 years. Whether it's by death, infidelity or certain acts that simply can't be forgiven...when you lose someone close to you, it's a death and you mourn. I am very familiar with Ashely Davis-Bush and have read some of her books, which I found comforting and helpful. Hope & Healing and Transcending Loss. I also have read several books by James Van Praagh as well. I'm a person who believes in signs and spirits. And I also agree with you, in that everyone deals with their grief individually and there are no set rules. Like myself, you seem to be a very strong, intelligent and resilient woman and even though you've lost so much, you realize the need to keep going and living. Your family would be proud of you I'm sure. That's basically how I live my life now. In a manner that I know would make my parents proud of me. Even though they're not with me, I feel their spirit and inspiration daily. It's that and all the wonderful memories that I hold on that keep me going. Thanks for your post and I hope 2017 brings you health and happiness and healing. Best, Ellen
